Red Flags Dating a Narcissist

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I decided to combine two of my best performing articles, and write about red flags dating a narcissist.

NPD, or narcissistic personality disorder is hard to spot.

Even for trained professionals, it is hard to single them out, so I have done my best to cover the red flags below.

For you or me, it is almost impossible.

The only reason why I do it is to help you understand the red flags you need to be on the lookout for when you are dating.

Before I go into the topic much further, I just want to make one thing clear:

I am not a trained professional about NPD, but a relationship coach who wants to help singles just like you navigate as safe as possible in the “dating jungle”.

What are the red flags dating a narcissist that you must be aware of, to avoid as much as humanly possible to be in a relationship with him or her?

Below, I cover the red flags dating a narcissist in greater detail…

How to Spot the Red Flags Dating a Narcissist

Even if it is hard to spot the red flags dating a narcissist, it is NOT impossible.

In my first article about this topic, I shared seven tell-tale signs that you’re dating a narcissist that you may find useful.

If you want to read about them now, here is where you can do it.

What makes it even trickier for ordinary people, like you and me to spot the red flags of dating a narcissist is that the red flags can be mistaken as a genuine concern for your well being.

In this section, I will share a little bit about first date red flags to be looking for, as well as the early red flags you need to know as well.

After that, I will talk a little bit about the red flags you need to be looking for in the person you are dating and that will be completely different depending on whether you’re dating a man or a woman.

Let me begin by asking you the following question:

What Are the Narcissist Early Red Flags I Need to Know?

As I told you above, I shared seven signs, but here I wanted to share the early red flags that you can spot in a narcissist early on.

• He or she is quite charming. If he or she is an adorable person, it does not necessarily have to be a narcissist you’re dealing with here, of course. If it’s the first date, then it might just be that the person makes a real effort to show you the best side of him or her.
• He or she wants to be intimate quickly. People who suffer from NPD tend to take things to the next level and want to have sex with you or become engaged and married ASAP.
• He or she bashes on the ex. Breaking up is hurtful, and it leaves scars in your soul, and you in a complete mess. However, a narcissist makes up a story where he or she is entirely innocent and put all the blame of the failed relationship on the exes.
• He or she contradicts themselves and becomes angry when you’re exposing them. The stories your date will tell you about is often contradictory, and if you point it out to the narcissist, he or she will become angry at you when you expose their lies.
• He or she wants you to be perfect, and criticise you when you fail to live up to his or her standards. You also need to be aware of the fact that a narcissist demands you to be perfect. However, it is perfectly fine for him or her to not live up to their standards.

My best advice to you is that if you start to notice contradictory behaviour in the person you are dating, he or she might be a narcissist.

A person who always criticize you is not someone who deserves you.

I think that everyone deserves to be in a relationship that lifts you, and not in a relationship that wears you down.

If you don’t leave, here is what may or may not happen to you.

First Date Red Flags Narcissist

Are there any particular red flags dating a narcissist that you may spot on the first date?

Yes, there are, and I will make a list of them below:

• He or she says “I love you” quickly. The main reason for this is because he or she wants to get you into the bedroom on the first date, especially if you say that you don’t wish to be intimate so quickly.
• He or she wants every second of your time. If you can’t do it, he will become extremely moody, but if you can do it, he will tell you how much he wants to spend every second with you that he possibly can.
• He or she is critical of other people. It doesn’t matter whether it is his or her boss, a co-worker, an ex, or one or several of your friends. They always make matters worse, and never seem to do anything right, according to the narcissist. If the person runs the “blame game” and blames everything on someone else, it might be a sign that the person you are dating is a narcissist.
• His or her parents are either the worst or the best. The same goes for the parents. If he or she badmouths his mother or father, sometimes, while other times they are as close to perfection as humanly possible, this might be a red flag that you are dating a narcissist.
• He or she claims to be the most truthful person in the whole full world. Another trait is there is never someone as honest as the narcissist, according to the narcissist.

I hope you now understand a few red flags you need to be aware of that are quite revealing.

My best advice to you is to leave the person as quickly as possible.

What Are the Red Flags Dating a Narcissist?

Above I have shared ten red flags dating a narcissist.

You may summarise the red flags dating a narcissist as look for inconsistencies, and if they show temper when they are caught with a lie, these may be a sign that you’re dating a narcissist.

As I told you in the beginning, the ten red flags dating a narcissist that I have covered so far is by no means a complete checklist.

I decided to share them with you to help you decide what a narcissist is.

But one question might still be on your mind right now.

The question: Are the red flags dating a narcissist the same for men and women?

Red Flags Dating a Narcissist Man

What kind of red flags should you be on the lookout for when dating a narcissistic man?

I have shared ten general red flags dating a narcissist above.

What follows below is a summary of my findings in this article with some more information about what a male psychopath might do to you:

• He wants you to be perfect. He will always demand that you behave how he wants you to act because if you don’t, he will end the relationship with you.
• He belittles other people and loves doing it.
• He hates it when you do not spend time with him. He might even want you to get a job closer to home or quit your job. He does it to be able to control you.
• He might call your friends and parents names that are deteriorating, and tell you that your friends are not suitable for you.
• He will demand that you end all relationships except the ones he approves of, which is with his side of the family and his friends.
• He will demand that you forgive him and claim that he always will be faithful to you while he will lie, cheat, and blame everything on you.
• He will never make any excuses or acknowledge that he has done anything wrong. It is always someone else who he will blame for his actions, and everyone else should forgive him.

Now you know seven extraordinary things that you should be on the lookout for since they might be red flags dating a narcissist.

Now that we have covered the traits of a narcissist man, do you think they are any different for a female narcissist?

Red Flags Dating a Narcissist Woman

Do you know the red flags dating a narcissist who is a woman?

If you don’t I share them below with you, and they are slightly different but yet highly manipulative.

• She wants you to be perfect. She will always demand that you behave how she wants you to act because if you don’t, she will end the relationship with you.
• She belittles other people and loves doing it.
• She hates it when you do not spend time with her. She might even want you to get a job closer to home just to be able to spend more time with you because the thing you have is so special to her, and something she never experienced before. She does it to be able to control you.
• She might call your friends and parents names that are deteriorating, and tell you that your friends are not suitable for you.
• She will demand that you end all relationships except the ones she approves of, which is with her side of the family and friends.
• She will demand that you forgive her and claim that she always will be faithful to you while she will lie, cheat, and blame everything on you. She might even accuse you of cheating on her and trying to destroy the “special bond” that the two of you have that she never experienced with anyone else before.
• She will never make any excuses or acknowledge that she has done anything wrong. It is always someone else who she will blame for her actions, and everyone else should forgive her.

There were slight differences between male and female narcissists, as you now know.

I hope that it has helped you.

If you know of someone who will benefit from the information I have shared with you, please don’t hesitate but share it with him or her.

I am doing this to help people.

All you need to do to share this article is to push one of the buttons to the right (bottom if you are watching it on your phone).

Stay safe, and happy dating,

Rickard