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In this blog post, I will talk about something that is very important both when you are dating and if you are in a relationship with someone.
Every relationship is built on respect and trust. The first aspect did I write about in a previous post. Now it’s time for the latter one to be dealt with.
Read more below…
Trust Is Earned But Not Something You Can Buy
Trust is something that you both deserve and earn from another person, I have been told and this is also true to my own experience with both friends and previous girlfriends.
So how can you earn someone’s trust? Well, as it turns out it’s not the easiest thing to describe such an abstract term in words but I’ll decide that I’ll try.
In the easiest description, possible trust is something you give someone you rely on. Think about your local congregation, your colleagues, and your employer.
You trust them and they trust you back. The same is true in every human relationship, no matter if it’s a romantic one, in a business or in other contexts where humans need to co-operate and giving something extra value.
I honestly think that you read this post since you trust me and that you also appreciate what I write about. I always try to have an honest and up-front approach to everything that I write.
The headline is right: You can’t buy trust but you can, however, earn it.
It all starts with the family. So a safe upbringing is a foundation for trusting others, according to psychological research.
Sociology, on the other hand, talk about which position you or a company have in both the smaller and larger scale.
Philosophy has yet another definition of what trust is. It teaches us that a person, if he or she does what we suppose him or her to do, then they earn our trust.
If you want more information you can read the entire Wikipedia-article here that I have made a summary of above.
However, I would also add two more perspectives of trust: The theological and of course the dating side of things.
The theological definition of trust is founded on what God has promised us: That He keeps His word which He also has done when He sent Jesus Christ to earth to save us all from sin.
We pray to God and know that He hears and answers our prayers too, right? Because if we wouldn’t believe in this, there would be no meaning what so ever to pray to Him.
If you read the Bible, no matter if it’s the Old or New Testament you will realize that God is true to His word and that He never leaves His people in the darkness but leads it from slavery to freedom.
Whether it is bondage in Egypt, forced labor in Babylon or the Law that is causing the state of slavery, God leads His people to freedom. The ultimate freedom is the freedom we all have in Jesus Christ.
When it comes to trusting in dating it’s a different story. Since more and more people are dating through an app or a dating site, the first thing we encounter is a profile with some text that describes the other person and hopefully a photo or a video.
If we like the person, we will send an email or maybe a flirt and hope to get a response. We might even chat with that person and then we might trust that person.
Yes, from the philosophical side of things we do think that the other person should act as we think he or she would act however this is based on what we have read in the profile.
If someone has written a profile in perfect English but then when we talk with them speaks or writes poorly, it’s a big issue and we would loose any trust we might have gained before if that person don’t tell us that he or she might have got some help writing it and for a certain reason.
For this reason, the trust in dating is based upon the use of language as well as the image or video the person has uploaded to his or her profile.
I would also like to add that trusting your gut is a good advice when it comes to dating. If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
How To Earn Trust When You Are Dating
For this reason, you need, to be honest with the person you are dating. Trust is something to build a relationship on and it begins with your profile. If you have any problems writing something, let that person know because disappointment is not good and that might ruin your chances.
Be honest to build trust and show respect for the person you are dating, this is the two best advice that anybody could give you.
Next blog post
My next blog post will be published on the 10th of October 2015.
It will be about the mindset you need to have when you’re dating.
See you then,
Rickard
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