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There are many reasons a man pretends to love you when he doesn’t.
In this article, you will find twenty-one sure signs that he acts to adore you and treats you like a toy, not an actual human being.
The 21 Sure Signs He Pretends to Love You Are
To summarize them, they are:
- He does not say much.
- You are always taking the initiative.
- You notice that he pulls away and becomes emotionally distant.
- He does not want to spend time with you willingly.
- He doesn’t laugh at your jokes any longer.
- Celebrations are a waste of time, in his opinion.
- He immediately wants a favor from you when he does something for you.
- He misses dates and doesn’t apologize.
- He doesn’t bother calling you to check in on you.
- He claims he doesn’t love you.
- Meeting your friends and family isn’t one of his priorities.
- He cheats on you.
- He tries to limit you.
- He hides things from you.
- He gives other women more attention than you.
- He takes you for granted.
- He doesn’t support you.
- He lies a lot to you.
- He badmouths you in front of others.
- He hates when you check his phone.
- He is not ready to commit to you.
Please keep reading by tapping or clicking on the blue button below to get all the details.
Sign #1: He Does Not Say Much
It is probably not that he lacks communication skills.
Sometimes men do not share and do not speak much of what they think of or what is on their mind. Men want to solve the world’s problems themselves in solitude, not by sharing them with women.
So, it is not necessarily that he doesn’t love you if you notice that he pulls away for some time.
When he becomes distant over time, always making excuses for NOT seeing you, whether he blames it on his work or his friends – that is when you should worry about this kind of behavior.
Communication is vital in all relationships, as you know, and something I’ve emphasized a great deal.
If you lack communication skills, you lack one of the pivots of relationships, and even if he is not the most talkative person, he still needs to talk with you.
He should also be eager to see you and ensure he can see you as soon as possible.
If he always excuses why he can’t see you, something is wrong, and it should be of great concern to you, and then you need to do something about it.
Here is what I recommend you do to make him open up to you.
In that article, you will read about the best ways to make him open up mentally, physically, and emotionally to you so that you know what is going on with your relationship.
Sign #2 That He Only Pretends to Love You: You Are the One Who Is Always Taking the Initiative
Sometimes the woman must take the first initiative, but it shouldn’t always be you who initiate things.
A man who pretends to love you will never take the initiative, surprise you, do things for you, or share his inner thoughts.
He never makes the first move, and you always have to take the initiative.
Don’t get me wrong – men still find it quite sexy and hot if you, as a woman, make the first move occasionally, but if you always have to initiate things, it should be a cause of concern to you.
Sure Sign He Pretends to Love You #3: You Notice That He Pulls Away and Become Distant
Men pull away for different reasons, so it isn’t a sure sign he pretends to love you if he’s becoming a bit distant from time to time.
Here’s an article that describes why men pull away in greater detail.
In that article, I discuss when it is not anything to worry about and how he acts since it is behavior that will determine whether you need to observe him closely to figure out if he’s not into you.
A man who pulls away AND becomes distant simultaneously is something that should cause concern.
When you notice that he becomes more secretive and doesn’t want you to look at his phone, and you start to feel that he is not paying attention to you or remembering things to say, you need to begin to worry about where your relationship is going.
In this article, I share what you can do when a man pulls away and become emotionally distant.
You will get an effective countermeasure that will stop him in his tracks and figure out whether he only pretends to love you or if he is being hesitant about your relationship.
Sign #4: He Isn’t Eager to Spend Time with You
When he doesn’t work or have other commitments, he should be eager to spend time with you, but if he doesn’t, that might be a clear sign that he doesn’t love you.
It would help if you made the first move always, and he always tries to do other things.
If you notice that your schedules don’t seem to match any longer, he might pretend to love you and only use you to satisfy his selfish needs.
If you did something that you now regret, there is one thing you can do.
You need to speak to his heart his mind to get your message through and understand what is truly going on inside his mind.
If you want more ideas on how to speak to his heart, you might benefit from reading this article next.
Sign #5: He Doesn’t Laugh At Your Jokes Any Longer
I think that humor can help overcome most crises and that having the same sense of humor is essential to all romantic and professional relationships.
Laughing releases endorphins which causes us to feel good.
If you notice that he doesn’t laugh at your jokes like he used to, it might be a sign that he pretends to love you and is not in love with you.
Here is more information on why humor matters in relationships.
Sure Sign He Only Pretends to Love You #6: Celebrating Special Occasions Is a Waste of Time
Indeed some people hate celebrating things that happened in the past, but if he thinks that celebrating your special occasions is a waste of time and money, he might not be in love with you.
If he is in love with you, it should be his priority to celebrate the things that mean the most to him, namely you and the anniversaries you have together as a couple and as individuals.
It might indicate that he pretends to love you if he doesn’t want that.
Sign #7: He Wants the Favor Returned Immediately
A man who doesn’t love you is only willing to help if he knows he can collect the favor fast.
So, if he does something for you, no matter how big or small of service it is to you, he immediately asks you to return the favor the same day or within the same week.
On the other hand, a man who loves you isn’t asking you to return the favor that quickly.
Sign #8: He Misses Appointments with You
If he habitually misses appointments with you, you’re not a priority, and he has put you in the friend zone.
Being in the friend zone is not where you want to be if you want a romantic relationship; it only wastes your precious time.
A sure sign that he is not in love with you is that he never apologizes when he misses out on a date.
Men who don’t care or aren’t passionate about you think you are wasting their time when, in fact, they are a waste of both your times.
You are better off with someone who does not make excuses for NOT spending time with you.
Sign He Pretends to Love You #9: He Never Returns Calls or Checks In with You Occasionally
If he loves you, that would be a sure sign that he is in love with you.
As I wrote in another article, a man who cares makes you his #1 priority and ensures that he does not miss an opportunity to hang out with you, even if it is only five minutes.
Men who don’t text or call the woman they claim to love display this behavior.
In contrast, men who do not pretend to love you but love you wholeheartedly display these nineteen signs of passion that are easy to miss unless you know them.
Sign #10: He Claims He Doesn’t Love You and Tries to Manipulate You
If that is what he says but acts as if he loves you, it might be a way for him to manipulate you to get what he wants.
It is a sure sign of dishonesty and a man uncertain of his wants.
If he displays this behavior, it should raise some red flags in your mind since he is trying to play with you like you are some toy, not an actual human being with feelings and a will of your own.
To get more details, I recommend reading the article “Is Your Husband Distant?“
Sign #11: He Doesn’t Want to Meet People Who Matter to You
If you try to get him to meet people who matter to you, like your friends and family, especially your parents, but he refuses to do it, it is clear he doesn’t love you.
Conversely, a man who loves you will ensure he meets them ASAP.
Sign He Pretends to Love You #12: He Cheats On You
Cheating is the ultimate betrayal of the trust you put into him and the relationship.
A man who cheats on you isn’t sincere about your relationship and does not care about your emotions, especially if he does it repeatedly.
If you’re worried that he is cheating on you, but aren’t sure, here are the specific signs of cheating.
In that article, I share the tell-tale signs that he is cheating on you and how you can repair that relationship if you still want to give him another chance.
Sign #13: He Tries to Limit You
There are many other things besides cheating he can do that are sure signs that he pretends to love you but doesn’t.
If he displays limiting behavior like trying to control who you meet or what you talk about with your friends or starts to badmouth your friends in front of you and tell you that he thinks that certain friends have a terrible influence on you, it is a massive cause of concern.
Another thing you need to watch out for is if he tries to tell you where you are allowed to go and where you’re not.
These are the typical signs that he might be a psychopath or a sociopath.
Both psychopaths and sociopaths are mental disorders and are skilled liars and masters of manipulation who are very easy to fall in love with but hard to get away from since they use limiting behaviors such as the ones described above to control and manipulate their victims.
If you want to know about the difference and why they are so charming and hard to spot, you should read this article, where I share some typical personality traits for both psychopaths and sociopaths.
Sign #14: He Hides Things from You and Keeps Secrets from You
Openness is essential in relationships; if he lies and keeps things secret from you, this is a clear sign that something is wrong.
A clear sign that he pretends to love you is that he doesn’t tell you everything that’s going on in his life.
Another indication is that he doesn’t like it when you go through his phone or follow him on social media, which I will discuss in a little more detail soon.
Signs He Only Pretends to Like You #15: He Gives Other Women More Attention Than You.
If you ever notice that he is flirtatious and fun toward other women than you, the woman he claims to love, it is a cause for concern.
When you notice that he is more open and fun to other women while badmouthing you, it might indicate that he isn’t as passionate about you as he claims to be, or at least pretends to be.
Then there is probably no future for your relationship with him.
Sign #16: He Takes You for Granted
Even many years from now, if you are still together, he should never act like he’s taking you for granted to stay and be with him for the rest of your lives.
A man who takes you for granted displays a particular set of behaviors.
Something that should alert you that he doesn’t love you is that while he doesn’t like to surprise you with things or spend money on you, he has no problems paying for something for his friends and other women.
If you notice that, here is what you must do to reignite his passion for you.
In that article, I share how you can easily spot if he’s passionate about you and how you can quickly reignite the flame if it is long gone.
Sign #17 That He Pretends to Love You: He Doesn’t Support You
A man who demands that you support him and whatever he wants to do but doesn’t support your endeavors is someone who doesn’t love you.
If he did, he would be supportive and cheering on you.
It doesn’t matter what big or small endeavors you are thinking of, like making a career change, going back to school, or something as simple as changing the curtain and the carpet in your living room.
He doesn’t love you if he tells you why you can’t do it or tries to limit your choices to suit his needs.
Sign #18: He Lies a Lot to You
Men who lie aren’t just bad boys.
You can’t trust someone consistently lying to you, and you shouldn’t be in a relationship with someone who betrays you or your trust.
I think you deserve better and that you should dump him ASAP.
If you want to know what to do about a lying man and hopefully change his behavior, I recommend you read my article “Why Is He Lying to Me?”
In that article, I share the real reasons why men lie to women they claim to love but don’t show it publicly.
Signs He Pretends to Love You #19: He Badmouths You
He doesn’t love you if he talks badly about you and shares your secrets with other women.
Trust is essential in all human relationships, and a man who can’t keep secrets and shares them with other women can’t be trusted.
Sign He Doesn’t Love You #20: He Hates It When You Check His Phone
A man who is overprotective and anxious when you check his phone might have started to cheat on you.
A clear sign of emotional cheating is that he doesn’t want you to see who he’s following on social media or that you want to go through his phone.
It means that he doesn’t love you enough to remain faithful and doesn’t care for your feelings.
Sign #21: He Isn’t Ready to Commit to You
All the signs I shared with you clearly show that the man you love and who claims to love you has specific commitment issues that are troubling at best.
If he isn’t ready to commit or show these commitment issues. You probably do best without him.
I know that is not what you want to hear, but that is what I think you should do. Don’t be in a relationship with a man who doesn’t love you. You are too precious and too important for that.
Unfortunately, some women stay content with men who aren’t good for them.
They also stay in these unhappy relationships and marriages because they think they are failing as women if they break up with him.
Nothing could be further from the truth. You deserve better.
Before I end this article, I will once more repeat all the signs and then give you some pieces I have written before that I think you will find quite helpful.
The 21 Signs He Pretends to Love You Once More
In this article, I have shared the 21 signs that he pretends to love you but is probably only playing you to suit his selfish needs.
If you missed them, or want a quick repetition of them, here they are once more:
- He does not say much.
- You are always taking the initiative.
- You notice that he pulls away and becomes emotionally distant.
- He does not want to spend time with you willingly.
- He doesn’t laugh at your jokes any longer.
- Celebrations are a waste of time, in his opinion.
- He immediately wants a favor from you when he does something for you.
- He misses dates and doesn’t apologize.
- He doesn’t bother calling you to check in on you.
- He claims he doesn’t love you.
- Meeting your friends and family isn’t one of his priorities.
- He cheats on you.
- He tries to limit you.
- He hides things from you.
- He gives other women more attention than you.
- He takes you for granted.
- He doesn’t support you.
- He lies a lot to you.
- He badmouths you in front of others.
- He hates when you check his phone.
- He is not ready to commit to you.
As I shared with you throughout this article, a man displaying any of these signs is not worth your time, and you do your best to dump him and move on with his life.
I have also shared how some men try to manipulate you to stay in an unhappy relationship.
If a man ever displays them and you want help to get out of a limiting and controlling relationship, you need professional help.
Try to book an appointment with a professional in your area.
If you want some free additional help to improve the quality of your relationship, you are more than welcome to subscribe to my free newsletter below.
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As a way of saying thanks, you will receive a free ebook that will hopefully be helpful, and you can always reach out to me by emailing the address where you receive my newsletter since I’m the only one with access to that email.
Recommended Reading for You
Other women who read this article have also found these articles to be helpful since they elaborate on specific details that I discuss in this article.
Communication Is Vital to Relationships
Emotionally Distant Men – Why Men Pull Away
The Importance of Humor in Relationships
Speak to His Heart – Ignite the Passion
When a Man Is Passionate About You
What Are the Real Signs He Is Cheating on Me?
For better relationships for all of us,
Rickard
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